Thursday, November 5, 2009

To Whom It May Concern…

Hi, my name is Fiona. Yes, just Fiona, you know like Cher. Except there is one big difference: I’m a Princess of the Underworld of Light. I am also a secondary character in Reincarnate the Night, which is the book about Selena and Drakar’s love story, that my human friend is writing. Yes, the human friend I’ve made write this letter. I love my powers. ;-)

Anywhooo—my sister, Miranda, who BTW is also a Princess in the UoL, (and waaaay older than I am), is really busy fighting off the Red Greek Vampires in St. Petersburg, FL., with her uber sexy Guardians of the UoL, and trying to get Selena and Drakar back together, after keeping them apart for oh…I don’t know, like fifteen hundred years or something. Crazy, I know, but that’s the Gods for you. (Please don’t tell my parents I just said that, I’ll be in deep doo-doo)

So I’ve got some time on my hands, since I’m only eighteen hundred years old, and mum and dad don’t think I’m old enough to kill those nasty Reds, that like to paint the town in blood. But I’m ready, they just won’t listen. Plus, we have to get this whole Selena and Drakar thing figured out. And let me tell you, it’s a mess. If I had anything to do with it, this would all be over with by now.

You see Selena is a human…well, was human. Now she’s a fairy Guardian of the UoL with wings and fangs, the first ever. It’s so cool, I really want wings. But before that, when she really did have a human soul, my parents made a deal with Drakar, who was turned into a vampire by the Reds, then saved by my mum, who felt his pain while he was stuck in the UoD dying. Oh sorry, the Underworld of Darkness.

So back to that bargain Drakar made. Since he was going to live forever, my mum agreed to have his soul mate reincarnated seven times (she was dying anyway of a rare blood disorder) so he could try to convince her to be with him forever.

Yeah you know there was an ulterior motive right? Mum wasn’t so honest in why she was doing this deal. But he agreed, and now guess what? Yep, this is life seven (for him anyway). The end. Finato. And to top it all off, now that Selena can live forever she doesn’t so much like Drakar because he smells like rats to her. It's the Red blood in him from his change. I don't smell it anymore, but whatever.

It’s a mess I tell you, but I promise, it will all work out in the end. It will if I have anything to do about it, that is.

Why am I telling you all this. Well my human author friend says we have to find an agent or editor, and she “is looking at prospects”. So I thought, what the heck (can’t say the H. E. double tooth pick word, dad makes me put money in his swear jar. It is where we live after all). So I’m writing this letter because I hear these people are supposed to work with the human authors. And we have to start somewhere, right? I say, "let the interviewing of prospects begin," Than maybe I’ll get a life in the process and finally be listened to.


F: What? There is nothing wrong with this form of communication.
L: No, no Fiona it's fine.
F: Can I have wings now?
L: No you still can't have wings.
F: Can I at least change my family crest tattoo?
L: Fine change your tattoo, your mum will make you change it back anyway.......
L: Do you see what it's like in my head!!!


Anne-Marie Carroll said...

OMG. I'm laughing so hard I can't comment. lol I say go for it and send it out. The voice is absolutely outstanding.

Karen Lingefelt said...

Laurie? Fiona? Either of you? Well, To WhomEVER It May Concern: You Got Voice.

I can hardly wait to read this book!

LKap said...

AM -
Thanks I'm glad you liked it - I like Fiona too.
Oh course she is telling me she's right here and can read - oh well what am I supposed to do with a teenaged Princess no less :-)

Karen -
Thank you so much for popping in - I...we, hope you get to read this book soon too

Brandy W said...

Oh Fiona. Can't get that Laurie to listen to you for the book and wings so you busted out didn't you? lol

Laurie you'll have to let me know how it goes.

Vicki said...

Hey Fiona!! What's up girlfriend. So glad to see you've taken matters into your own hands, but then you usually do. :)

Keep working on the wings, maybe you'll talk mom and dad into for b-day surprise. Heehee

Gail said...

LMAO Fiona is a hoot! Personally I'm happy knowing you (& fellow authors)have all those voices fighting for their right to have their story told-if not, I wouldn't have anything to read;-)

LKap said...

What's up my peeps!!!
Fiona here. See I told L this would all be fine, I mean looking through the magic glass I see: Anne Marie, Karen, L (who was supposed to let me answer BTW), Brandy, V and Gail, and I'm so sure there will be more.
I have to admit this is way cooler than reading peoples minds a bit too human acting for me, but quite entertaining none the less.
So where are the peeps who want to hear about me, huh? :-)

Oh and mum made me get rid of the horned smily face tattoo - I so can't wait to be on my own.
Tootles for now chickies

Maggi said...

I think I peed a little with all the laughing. So funny!! Now I really want to read this book!!!!